


Losing Her

by Wallwalker



Category: Skies of Arcadia
Genre: Angst, Community: 30_kisses, F/F, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-01
Updated: 2009-12-01
Packaged: 2017-10-04 01:30:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wallwalker/pseuds/Wallwalker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aika tries to deal with the possibility of losing Fina for good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Losing Her

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for [30_kisses](http://community.livejournal.com/30_kisses) at Livejournal. Set immediately after retrieving the Yellow Moon Crystal.

Aika always tried to stay cheerful, maybe harder than anyone else she knew. She always said that maybe if she could keep smiling, she could make others keep smiling too.

She was trying her best, but there were some things that she just couldn't keep smiling about. Like realizing last night that she might end up losing Fina forever, never seeing her again...

Yeah, it was hard. Really hard.

She was sitting on her bed, staring at the wall. The nasty fight they'd had earlier that day with the Yellow Gigas had worn her out, and she wanted nothing more but to sleep. But every time she closed her eyes she saw Fina's face, the way that she'd tried so hard to smile when she'd looked at Aika.

Aika knew that she wasn't very good at hiding how she felt when she was really unhappy. She never had been, and so she'd just accepted that fact about herself a long time ago. Still.... She thought of the hurt she'd felt, the lump that had suddenly swelled in her throat at the thought of Fina leaving. Fina must have seen it too. Maybe she'd hurt her friend without even trying, and that thought made her feel even worse.

Losing Fina felt like it was going to be even harder than losing her parents had been. Fina was her best friend, maybe the best friend she'd ever had besides Vyse, and that was enough to make anyone sad. But somehow it seemed even worse than losing a best friend. She felt like she was going to lose part of herself, when she thought of Fina going away - flying away on that tiny little boat, the wind in her hair as she disappeared forever with the Crystals.

_I don't want you to go, Fina,_ she thought, leaning against the wall by her bed and wrapping her arms tightly around herself. _Why can't we just stay together forever? Maybe we could..._ A sudden flash of insight hit her, and for a moment it filled her with hope. _Maybe I could go with you,_ she said, feeling her heart starting to pound at the thought of it. Flying somewhere that no one else had ever seen before with her best friend, staying with her forever... it would be their own little world, just for the two of them. Really, Aika didn't care what the Great Silver Shrine was like - it would be just fine, as long as she wasn't alone.

Then she shook her head and sighed. It was such a nice thought, but then she'd remember Vyse, who had been her best friend for so long she'd lost count and who would probably want to stay behind to finish what they'd started with Valua. She hated the thought of never seeing him again just as much as she hated the thought of losing Fina...

So that idea was out. Aika was greedy, in some ways; she didn't let go of the people she loved easily. But it seemed like she'd have to let go of one or the other of them pretty soon... she wasn't going to have much choice.

_It's not like Fina's leaving tomorrow or something,_ she told herself, trying to calm herself down a little. _We have to find her ship first, right? So I'll have time to say goodbye, at least. I mean, I don't want to, but that's better than not saying goodbye, right?_

She stood up and stretched, shaking out her long hair. She was just wasting her time sitting there, not being able to sleep. Maybe taking a walk would make her feel better. So she pulled on a tunic and grabbed the sandals she'd picked up in Yaufotoma, and walked out of the room, being careful to close the door behind her very quietly.

It was a nice night, at least; Crescent Isle was close enough to the Red Moon to be warm at night, but far enough that it wasn't hopelessly dry and dusty like the deserts near Nasrad. The night was clear, with a light, refreshing breeze.

Aika walked down the wide ramp and over to the fountain, the one that Kirala had made. It had been built to resemble Cupil, an idea that Vyse had thought was a bit silly at first. Fina had loved it, though, so it had stayed. She sat down on the edge of the fountain and splashed her face with water, wincing a bit as it touched her skin and wondering briefly how they kept it so cool to the touch. Maybe there were some Blue Moon Stones hidden in the fountain that kept the water cold.

She sat there for a while, just looking up at the sky. She remembered doing that back at home for a while, counting the few stars that had outshone the light of the Silver Moon. There were more stars to see on Crescent Isle, since they weren't nearly so close to one of the Moons. It was a pretty sight, but after a while she couldn't stop herself from thinking about Fina, flying through that sky to some place where Aika couldn't follow. She looked down then, trying to shake off the feeling of melancholy that had crept up on her. She looked around the island, at the shadows in the moonlight, trying to collect her thoughts.

It wasn't long before Aika noticed that one of those shadows was moving slowly, over by the tavern. She stood up and squinted at it for a while before she recognized it in the darkness. "Fina?" she called out, a bit hesitantly.

Fina jumped and looked up. Aika couldn't see her face, but she was sure she could imagine her surprise. "Aika," she said, and walked over to the fountain. The shadows fell away from her as she walked - Aika could swear that she glowed, somehow. She was smiling gently as she approached. "You couldn't sleep either, could you?"

Aika shook her head. "I... I tried. But I was thinking."

"About what?" Fina sat next to her on the edge of the fountain, her smile fading. Her skin was pale and luminous in the light of the Red Moon.

"About you." She bit her lip, then, trying to keep herself from saying it, but it wouldn't let her keep it inside. "I don't want you to go, Fina," she blurted out finally, not able to hold it back anymore. She felt tears in her eyes and tried her best to keep them from falling. "Can't you come back after you give them the Crystals? Can't you tell them that you don't want to stay there anymore?"

Fina looked away, and Aika could hear her sighing. "I... I'm sorry, Aika. I just don't think the Elders would allow it. I will probably be in trouble just for making friends with you, after the Elders told me not to trust anyone."

"But it's not fair," she said. "Won't they be able to see that you like it here? That you wanted to stay here and be an Air Pirate like me and Vyse? They shouldn't make you do something you don't want to do, should they?"

"I don't know. But I'm the only Silvite left, now that Ramirez is gone." She paused, taking a deep breath. "They'll want me to stay there and help take care of the Shrine, I'm sure of it."

"I... I hate having to think about you being gone, Fina." A few tears fell, but she wiped them away quickly. _So much for staying happy,_ she thought sourly.

"Aika... listen." Fina turned to her and took her hand. "Do you remember when we were in Nasrad, and I was scared I'd never see Vyse again? Don't you remember what you told me? That everything always works out for the best, in the end?"

"Yeah," Aika said. "I remember."

Fina nodded. "I'm trying to remember that too, Aika. To believe that everything will be okay, no matter what."

Aika blinked, then tried her best to smile. How had she forgotten that? Even Nasrad, though, hadn't felt as final as this. She'd never believed for a minute that Vyse was gone for good, but then she'd watched him fall, not fly away. "I guess you're right."

"I'm right?" Fina smiled back at her. "You're the one who told me that."

"Yeah, but I hadn't thought about you..." She stopped, because she would just be saying the same thing over and over again.

"I'm so sorry, Aika."

Fina's voice seemed to catch in her throat, and she looked away. Aika suddenly realized that she was going to cry too. She squeezed her hand a little tighter, trying to comfort her. She felt like an idiot, making Fina cry again.

But Fina seemed to recover, and looked back at Aika. "I think that we should try to sleep, Aika," she said. "You told me that things seemed better when the sun was shining too, right?"

Aika nodded. "Yeah," she said. "Maybe you're right."

"Aika..." Fina did something that had surprised Aika, then, because she'd never done it before; she hadn't even been sure she'd wanted to. She leaned over and gave Aika a soft kiss, right on her freckled cheek, and squeezed her hand briefly. It didn't last long, or not nearly long enough at least; Aika could feel a sort of tingling in her body, unbroken even when Fina pulled her hand gently free, and she could see that whatever it was she'd felt, Fina had felt it too. "I'll see you in the morning," Fina whispered, and stood up and walked away.

Aika sighed quietly as she watched her go, and raised one hand to gently brush her cheek.

Fina was trying to be strong, wasn't she? Aika couldn't do any less than that. She had to try to keep smiling, and keep hoping.

Still... she knew that she was going to miss Fina even more than she'd imagined.


End file.
